In the early 2000s, when I first started on this path, if you were an outside of the box spiritual seeker in this city, (especially, of color) I probably knew or had heard of you. No, not because I was a popular spiritual fancy pants. There were honestly just so few of us. Now, it’s almost odd to meet someone that doesn’t use herbs (yes, that was once seen as hippie or witchy), or have a crystal or two.

Tonight, as I looked over my many trinkets, spiritual objects and doodads collected through the years, I started to wonder: Is any of this shit making people better?

“Is any of this shit making people better? ”

In a way, I believe that we are the spiritual ginny pigs for the next generation. Our children will have a nice book of secrets (as our indigenous ancestors did before us) because of all the things we’ve tried with betterment as our intention.

However, to hone this grimoire, from time to time we may need to ask ourselves, is any of this really growing me?

Now, this isn’t to the newbies on any path so please don’t meditate for a day and say, “Welp, Ashley said..”

…but if you’re right now sitting in your room, surrounded by crystals, buddha statues and singing bowls, awaiting the weekly skype with your “shaman” and your life is still crazy, maybe this is a wake up call from on High.

Today, our spiritual direction can come from so many places. Including a long list of fantastic social media self-help gurus, who are very easy to adore and almost fetishize, because of their beautifully curated photos and 10 step programs to perfection.

Honestly, even their bad hair day posts leave us in awe. We rarely get to see their unfiltered, spinach in the teeth moments; them flashing the finger at a slow driver, or getting uncharacteristically aggressive with the barista for making their latte with the wrong milk.

We don’t see how unreal or tight and micromanaged illusory perfection can really be and it becomes easy to compare and place judgement on ourselves based on these false images. I say this, not to blame anyone (I love and enjoy so many of these people as well!) but to bring reality to the situation. No, 98.2% (made up statistic) of the population doesn’t look glow’d up while they’re “getting some much needed RnR.” or have five colorful, rare and difficult to pronounce vegetables at, “Snack Time.” These are social media experts, relax.

So here we are, we’ve assigned ourselves to this new life. We’ve bought the candles/crystals/ 4-week series/sprays/oils/beads. Maybe in pursuit of our elusive spiritual greatness, we’ve additionally given ourself a new name, started doing yoga & taking 7 herbs a day while saging everything and everybody. Hell, we’re even vegan/vegetarian/pescatarian/justplainhungry now, but we’ve never stopped to ask ourselves:

Honey, are you happy?

Are you any better off than when you started?

Do you feel better?

Do you love differently?

Is your heart in a place that it wasn’t?

Have you attracted joy in your life?

Are these 25 herbs really necessary?

And we’re not alone.

So many are seeking something; trying to fill a void, searching outside of ourselves for what our spirit is saying it already knows. We want a quick fix to what ails us, and as we busy ourselves seeking answers from others, we can’t see that sometimes, the panacea is in the problem, and only we have the ability retrieve it.

“Sometimes, the panacea is in the problem.”

In this consumer culture, if we’re not careful, we can become obsessed with having spiritual things (knowledge, tools, abilities) just as much as others are obsessed with a new car, bling, or furs.

So here’s my unsolicited advice:

If what you’re doing is not bringing you closer to your own soul, if you don’t feel the presence of deepening within yourself and the beautiful array of emotions, experiences and epiphanies that arise from it, then I offer that you pause and discern.

It doesn’t mean you have to stop buying the 45 dollar candles that are supposed to clear your roads or, the crystals that call in the angels. (I’ve probably had some of all of that!) But go inside yourself, maybe sit in nature, give yourself a moment. Let the world unravel and remove its clutches from your beingness, and then ask,

“What do I need right now?” Pure, beautiful, vulnerable imperfect me.

You may feel the mind trying to ground you in some present desires, let it ramble and then go deeper. “What do I really need right now for my highest good?”

“Let the world unravel and remove its clutches from your beingness, and then ask ,
‘What do I need right now? ‘
Pure, beautiful, vulnerable imperfect me.”

The voice you’re listening for is almost silent. It may come in with the breeze, it may feel like a gentle tug on your ear, a fluttering from within, or an energy packed down so deep that you have to dig for a while to get it out.

I guarantee, what it wants is very simple, yet so deep and profound it may take time to get you there. Be gentle with yourself.

All of these tools and social media gurus are not the end but the means; allies on your path and a reflection of a realized potential that maybe dormant in you. Beloved, a spark that they hold, you also hold, it may not manifest the same way in the physical, because your journey’s and purpose are different.

Align yourself to your own inner compass. Dig inside for the jewel and the path that universal intelligence has placed solely in you. It is what you most need, it costs nothing, and has been with you since long before birth. Seek it.

THE TAKEAWAY:

I’m truly grateful that we’ve been given a platform and a lot of these wisdoms are coming out, but, in honesty, if it is not furthering your spirit, it’s probably of no use to you. It could be of use to millions of other people, just not for you. This does not diminish its worth, and certainly not yours. It just means that you, as the unique individual drop in this cosmic ocean, need a different tool to activate. Don’t be alarmed, confused or judgemental, just move on, and keep asking inside “What is the best thing for my growth at this time?”

Then, set yourself up to do the often most challenging part. Listen.

Love to you.

Your sister,

Ashley (Ife) Miya

Self-help Hippie are you Happy?: pitfalls to new age spirituality